I can't post today. My camera was going crazy and now Youtube! Is the electronic world against me? Here is something I have been meaning to say to you all.
Earlier in the week I was on my way home from work and I was disturbed by what I saw. A mother was on mass transit with her child, a boy probably around age 2, and he was all over the nasty floor. She then allowed him eat cherrios and other snacks which he forcefully flung out of his mouth when he had enough. He proceeded to do a ton of other yucky baby things that made me sick to my stomach, yet I couldn't turn away. I wanted to make sure she wouldn’t wobble over to me with his crumb ridden hands but that’s another story.The point is the mom looked frazzled beyond belief. I could almost envision her as a vibrant young lady but now she had a messy mop of hair sitting atop her head, her eyes were surrounded by dark circles and she just looked tired. Do chic mommas still exist? I don't have any kids yet but when I do, I plan on being the mom who zips around the city in stilettos (or any other cute shoe) with my baby in tow. Is this realistic? How do you mommas keep it chic and comfortable? Although you want to devote your time and attention to your little one, where does beauty fit into the picture?
Side note -Over the summer I saw another mom who allowed her daughter who looked about 4 years old, to sit on the NYC sidewalk. People passing by couldn't stop looking because it was just weird. They were waiting for the bus to arrive but in the meantime, momma handed the kid a sandwich. I watched as the kids hands went from the ground to the sandwich and back again.
Honestly I do love kids but they gross me out as well. However I recognize that the parents are to blame as when they allow young ones to touch and eat any and everything.....
Random
I googled myself today...is that lame? LOL Oh well it was fun anyway.
21 comments:
i hear what you say!!
that's my biggest fear: having a baby and also losing myself and forgetting who i was.
I see my friends who have babies and they're so overwhelmed and feel the pressure to be super wife and super mom
results: they're always tired and forget who they were before hubby and baby....
do chic mommas exist?
yes..i know this woman who just had a baby and she's the hottest momma on the block...
she runs errands in stiletto boots
i wanna be a fly momma too but i also dont want to put my appearance above my baby's. further, those nasty habits are a direct reflection of the parents. yes i want my kids to pick up antibodies and build up their resistance against disease but what u described was just dishevelled filth.
Wow, you are living in a fantasy world, the only mother's I see around my neighborhood rocking stilettos and pushing a stroller are around 14 trying to catch their next baby daddy, its very obvious from this post that you are a long way from entering the mommy arena, take it from a mother of three with 2 two-year-olds. I do take the time to somewhat pamper myself which is why I would visit a beauty blog like this one, but not to get advice about germs from someone with ZERO children. Maybe one day you’ll be blessed to know that mother’s have many priorities other than nail polish. Please stick to products because on THAT subject you defiantly know what you’re talking about. Post this or not I'll still view your blog for PRODUCT information.
ewww that is gross...i'm scared i'm going to get like that too...cuz i dress pretty casual now a days...hardly pulling out the heels anymore, and i'm still un-married without kids...yikes!
wow @ thfromthabay's comment. Chic mother exsit, visit NYC once in a while and I garantee you'll see a few.
PJD I have two older cousins who have 2 girls a piece and they still keep themselves looking up to par. If you want to keep yourself looking good, you'll find a way trust me.
BTW, having three little brothers who do nasty things as if it's second nature, I've come to realize they don't think twice about what they are doing. But if a parent sees a child doing something and says nothing I think that is utter nonsense.
I had to tell a little girl to stop passing her hands up and down the pole in the train. Her mother was looking at her and not saying anything...talk about gross...I thought I was somewhat out of place but the mother just smiled and said thank you.
Amina I totally know what you mean. Kids are so much work!!!!
Antithesis I am with you 100% babies come first, and LOL to the remainder of your comment.
@ Thfromthabay Three children what a blessing, congrats on that. No I'm not living in a fantasy world at all. Chic mommas exist and I know that they are out there. In fact I happen to know many women who can easily be classified as FABULOUSLY chic! I posed the question to get feedback from the readers and because in that moment while I watched that mom, my mind was racing and she just got me thinking about the topic. Nevertheless, I know for myself that such moms are out there in droves. No, they are not 14 and looking for a "baby daddy", the women that I know personally happen to be fulfilled, happily married gorgeous ladies. I didn't realize that sharing a story of what I witnessed could be construed as giving germ related advice. However, allowing your child to eat a sandwich while sitting on the sidewalk is indeed FILTHY. By no means would I suggest that beauty should take precedence over the well being of an individual’s child -that would be ridiculous. I in no way value “nail polish” over the life of a child or any individual for that matter. While this blog is a product blog based on items that I have personally used, I will from time to time post on whatever topic I desire, and that is my right just as reading this blog or not is a decision you will no doubt make for yourself. The stiletto comment was a personal one because I happen to love stilettos but I did write “(or any other cute shoe)”, which could include a wide range of footwear. In essence having a baby means that your time and attention will now be directed toward the human you were blessed to bring into the world, but it does not mean that you need to go around that world not even resembling your former self. Now to each his own, everyone has the right to look and wear whatever they want but I have made a personal choice to try my best to keep it all together. Mommy bloggers such as Tia, Yummy and countless others enjoy their lovely children but still manage to look lovely while doing so. In my opinion beauty products and nail polish should not be a priority in any individual’s life, unless of course they own a wonderful nail polish empire complete with nail files and other nail essentials, but I digress. Thanks for your comment though and stay tuned because I will stick to "nail products" and other things that I know about like cotton candy and rainbows etc…..you get the point!
Happy reading!
Mrs. Young Fashion you got it girl…lol
Ren You don't need heels at all, casual clothes can be chic also. I love casula garments. Any you are so beautiful diva so you have nothing to worry about!
I dunno. Giving benefit of the doubt, raising a kid is hard work. Not every day is going to stilletto's and designer diaper bags. We're also missing a lot of information. We don't know for her financial situation is like, if she has a partner at home to help her raise her child, what her job situation is like, etc. She could be struggling trying to managing everything on her own. Personally, I don't want children, however I typically view mom's like that with a little compassion. It can't be easy raising a kid. It's possible that the last thing on her mind is trying to impress strangers with her looks.
That being said, I'd be impressed if she had more control over her kid.
My boss is a fab mommy. She breezes into the office with her hair, brows, and makeup done. Almost every day, she puts my sorry butt to shame. BTW,I like it when you veer off product posts, it's all fun to me and this is kinda your blog :)
I was similarly disgusted when I saw a lady letting her 2-3 yo daughter walk through the airport INCLUDING THE PUBLIC BATHROOM barefoot! Just triflin'.
I'm a mommie of 3 and it's hard to look fab all the time but it's up to the individual. I get up early and do what I need to do. I go to bed late and make sure I keep my kids up to par first.
I am a mommy of 2 young girls and I am a fly momma b/c I want to set an example for them that you don't have to let yourself go b/c you've had kids. Is being a hot mama hard sometimes: yes, but if you don't feel like being a "diva" just let your natural beauty show. How you feel about yourself and your life shows through. Just by being with my beautiful daughters (which my body created) gives me the confidence to look good or at least try to in public. We are planning on adding to our family next year.
P.S. Most mommas don't let their kids do dirty things in public places or any other places.
google me baby....!
wow ya'll...it too early in my marridge to think about kids but i will say this:
being a chic mommy is not on the top of my list, but it is in the top five. in all the leadership seminars and workshops i go to, the one thing i've heard in all of them is "LEARN HOW TO BALANCE YOUR LIFE" this is entirely different that not having your priorites straight. i am a junkie of all types, product junkie,makeup junkie (love you renren!!), book junkie and all around knowledge junkie! most women who get consumed with their familes and forget about theirselves end up straying or becoming very bitter. (trust me, my developmental psych prof is a family psychlogist and she tells me plenty of things to prove this) back to the point:
there is absolutely nothing wrong with wanting to be a "hot" "chic" "put together" mommy, in fact..its encouraged!
kids are gross, in every shape and form...lol you just have to teach them otherwise, let them be free and explore.
as for me, i will not be an 40 year old psychology professor with kids feeling stressed and looking a hot mess! this is where the BALANCING ACT kicks in!
I really want kids but not tomorrow b/c I fear stretch marks and loosing the "flair". LOL, sounds crazy....yeahhhh, the story was so birth control for me. LMAO!
I do not have children and am not sure I will ever have them. That being said, I can understand why some moms may take offense reading what you wrote which you certainly have every right to write what you want. I think your description of the children was a bit judgmental. You do not have children nor do you know what it means to have a child. I am not suggesting that you said you knew what it was like but being a mom is a club you can only know what its like when you are a member. When and if you do decide to have children, your house will get messy from time to time and have crumbs. Why? Children are children and they make messes. Being a mom is a full time job and yes, moms are tired and exhausted so instead of looking at this woman as a mess, perhaps we can have some compassion when we see a mother who is having a hard day. I have nothing against a mom looking great as every mom deserves. I think it's great when moms take time out for themselves but there are days where that can't happen and won't happen. Many moms are doing it alone with little to no help. Was it great that this child was on the floor putting things in its mouth that were dirty? No. I am sure we have all as children did messy things and ate messy things too when our mom's back was turned. However, you are an outsider looking in so I hope next time you have more compassion for both mother and child. To get compassion and understanding from the world you must give it.
Hey Sis...
Yes its very realistic...I have 4 kids and a husband and I refuse to let myself go...
But thats just me...Its more work because Im tired all the time from giving so much of myself ...But I still take the time to look good for me and for my husband....
Velvet thanks for your comment. Raising kids is not an easy task I totally agree, but I dont want people to get the wrong impression. I am not suggesting that this mother or any mother for that fact, get all dolled up to impress the public..lol Much like what Amina mentioned my desire is that women don't lose who they are. I don't want them to lose sight of even the small things that can make them feel great. And i don't like to beat a dead horse but this woman did not have her back turned...lol she clearly saw what her kid was doing. Strangers even handed her her house keys (or what appeared to he house keys)from the floor after he threw them and she watched as he put them back in his mouth each time. In fact she handed him the keys....The baby also did things to a stranger but that too is another story so control that you mentioned was needed.
anyway thats another story I guess but thanks for your comment velvet.
TM thanks for your comment!
Savvy I totally feel what you are talking about.
Charmaine another mommy of 3, you go girl! I agree kids should always be well taken care of. I don't think anyone can look fab at all times I have no kids and I know I'm not fab at all times, that's just how it goes I guess.
Southern lady.Love your comment and I agree that most moms don't allow their kids to eat random things, which is why that stood out to me when I saw it happening. I like your comment about natural beauty also.
Free Reggie I do like that song...
Dysfunctionalchick I so appreciate your comment. Balance is key, so true.
B WHen you have kids I am sure you will not lose a thing, you are way too fab!
Anonymous you are right when you say that compassion is necessary. I have nothing against the kids, they are kids and certainly I understand that they get messy so I don't blame them at all, but I will always beleive that parents should try their best to help kids when they don't know what they should/shouldn't do.
Tracyee you know I totally meant to list your name right? I gasped later and said " I didn't list tracyee" :-).
So this is one of the reasons why I love blogs because people can have so many different opinions on the same topic.
Thanks for reading and sharing, I appreciate you all.
PJD
I HEAR YOU!!! I live in Brooklyn and the things I see kinda make me not want to become a mom. I'm afraid I'm going to let myself go...but I learned from MY mom that there's a way to be a chic mommy. My momma never leaves the house looking frazzled and would NEVER let me sit on the sidewalk or act a fool in public. Never lol
It's not a matter of putting yourself before you baby either. Cuz think about it, if you're not happy babies sense these things and it could affect them.
wow @ thfromthabay's comment: chic mommas do exist...i.e: my mom...and countless of other mom in NYC...and Brooklyn
I'm a mother to a 20 month old boy so i have some experience in this lol. I will admit, before i had my son and got married, i was some hot stuff lol I dressed like no ones business and my hair was always fly and i never wore a heel lower than 3 inches!! Now, i am a stay at home mom and my budget doesnt allow for new clothes and hairdo's too often. Even when i do get a good bit of money i feel a little guilty splurging on myself and instead choose to buy an outfit or somethin for my son. I only wear heels to church or if i'm going out somewhere nice, if not i usually where low sandals or ballet flats. I also live in skinny jeans and t-shirts! I also have dark circles under my eyes and im only 24 LOL. As for the germs...the 2 stories you told were not the grossest i have seen LOL. Trust me, these germs won't do nothing to them, and it's not possible to keep all the germs away!
Fashion's Darling- I'm glad you have a hot momma!
Cat-congrats on the baby and I'm sure you are still hot. I know you won't break the bak on yourself, but get something pretty every now and then...you deserve it!
lol
Have a great weekend ladies.
PJD
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