Friday, November 2, 2012

Random Chatter

Hola my Product Junkie Fam

If you watch the news you will be told, as I am , that things are getting back to normal during this post- Sandy period. Clearly, a week is not enough time to make such a declaration. The simple fact that we still can't find a gas station that actually has GAS is an indication that things are not back to normal. I walked to the store today, for those who know me personally, they are now picking their chins up off the ground. Apparently some trains and buses are running on a limited schedule. My job will reopen  on Monday.....ok and how am I supposed to get there??? Well we shall see, but the last I checked a tunnel that I go through to get to work was filled with 12 feet of water. In the end my family members and friends are alive so there is really not much to complain about. The NYC marathon has just been cancelled and some people are fuming because this decision should have been made days ago. While powerful generators and tractor trailers filled with food await runners who will no longer run the race, many wonder why those supplies were not dispatched sooner to those in need.

That's actually not why I decided to write this blog, but I just had to vent.
I read an article over at Clutch Magazine (love this online mag) about checking people and it made me think immediately of an episode of Don't Sleep. Nearly two weeks ago TJ Holmes had his first female dominated panel, which featured Vivica Fox and Crystal Wright. You can watch that episode here. If you were able to catch the episode, you witnessed the fiery retorts between the two women. Although some want to fling the words ghetto and bougie at Vivica and Crystal respectively, I think they both behaved in an unprofessional and childish manner. Having seen Vivica in the past converse with people who share her opinion, I know that hand clapping, wide sweeping hand movements and in your face hand gestures, are well within her gesticulatory repertoire. This is not to excuse her behavior because common sense dictates that when you disagree with someone if you include hair flinging, snapping fingers and similar movements, the person with whom you are conversing may find you to be disrespectful. Now Crystal is certainly not off the hook because her condescending comments and childish mimicry didn't go unnoticed. I was saddened that TJ's first show with two female panelists was tainted with women who couldn't control their emotions. Honestly I think both women were intimidated by the other for different reasons, but that's just me.... I would have preferred a pairing of Crystal and Issa Rae, because things would have played out in a totally different manner.

But, I digress - my point is if you have a difference of opinion with your coworkers, fellow panelists or anyone else, and you feel that you have been disrespected, there is a way to "check them" without being rude. I agree with some of the commenters over at Clutch, there are some remarks that you can let slide under the rug, but there are times when you just want to put a person in their place. Perhaps its our pride tapping us on the shoulder and nudging us to think of a quip that can singlehandedly turn our verbal opponent's self esteem into minced meat, but whatever it is  that motivated us to respond, I think it boils down to wanting them to feel what they made us feel. Unless their behavior or comment is overtly rude, perhaps we should consider why their remark cut us so deeply, maybe it's time for a little self- examination.
So I ask you, how do you handle people with the three personality types described in the Clutch magazine article? If you didn't get a chance to read the article it focused on those who are aggressive, passive- aggressive and know -it-alls.

Have a great weekend.


Abby said...

PJD, I am in New Jersey and I feel your frustration. My husband had to drive through many townships before finding a reasonable gas line to wait in! I am especially worried for those who do not have electricity still; the temps are dropping and a cold front is forecast for the Tri-State. The only thing giving me a temporary escape is sharpening my Black Friday List!

Product Junkie Diva said...

Hi Abby
It was so cold today! It looks like more bad weather is coming our way this week....not looking forward to any of it.

Product Junkie Diva said...

Abby- my Black Friday list is growing and I don't think that's a good
Thanks for reading.

Maven said...

First, my sympathies on all that's going on in NYC- I know it's rough. Second- you gave me EVERYTHING with the phrase "gesticular repertoire". Yes. Love all that. I must add that to my lexicon. Finally, checking people is usually best when done really calmly and properly, especially in a work setting. Sometimes when you come really educated, it really pisses them off more.

Product Junkie Diva said...

HI Maven
Thanks so much, things are moving along slowly but surely.
LOL@ your second comment.